Ho'oponopono and abuse

Ho'oponopono and abuse
Published: November 23, 2011

So often during my Ho’oponopono trainings there is one or two of my students who have been victims of abuse. It is always so hard for them to accept 100% responsibility and realize they were the ones that attracted it, especially if it happened to them as a child. Understand that seeing yourself as a victim is a choice and once you take full responsibility, it will set you free.

During one of my training in Romania, I mentioned to the class how important it is not to see ourselves as victims. I told them we are 100% responsible for every situation and every person we attract into our lives. I began to give examples about how we choose our parents and the situations we experience. Some of the students were surprised by my comments. Then a woman raised her hand and said, “When my daughter was little this fact had been confirmed to me.”

The mother and daughter were both at the training. The daughter began to share her story with us, she started by telling us how the memories were still so clear. Before she was actually conceived in her mother’s womb, she remembers being surrounded by many stars and that innately she knew one of those stars was her mother.  She began searching through the stars, when suddenly she saw a very bright star and at that moment she knew she had found her mother.

After that training in Romania I wrote about it in one of my newsletter, I  then received this e-mail from Rossana in Argentina:


I'm writing because when I read the newsletter, I was not surprised at the girl's story, since I went through something similar myself. It was seven years ago and I remembered everything so clearly, I remembered that when my life started I had chosen not to be born and I told the person who was guiding me that it had been wrong of me to choose that family, that I wasn't going to make it. But that person told me I had to do it, that I would make it, that I would not be alone because he would be by my side. He then led me by the hand to where the stars were and he left me there. From there I started traveling through the stars on my journey towards life. I thought it might be useful to share this experience.

Kind regards,


So, if we had a difficult time with our parents, it is hard for us to accept that we chose it, because we forgot who we are. How could we even consider the possibility of choosing an experience like that? Well, we didn’t at a conscious level, but there was a part of us that knew better.

One day I got an e-mail that said, this person went through this too? Guess who they were speaking of, Oprah Winfrey. Pay attention. Look around. Many people who have had terrible experiences in their life, chose not to see themselves as victims anymore and are now using their experience to make a difference in the World.

Do you consider yourself a victim of abuse? Then it is time to wake up and make a difference. You are here for something BIG. You are BIG. You just don’t remember. You needed to go through that either to pay a debt you didn’t remember you had so you could set yourself free, and/or to help others that went through the same experience and remind them they are above the abuse.

We come to make amends, discover who we are and set ourselves free. The Universe is always perfect and situations in our lives are simply blessings in disguise.

The problem is never the problem, but how we react to the problem is the problem. It is never you, nor the other person, but the programs playing in the subconscious mind. These programs can attract the perfect situation and give us the opportunity to let go and erase.

Let me share a  study that was done with prisoners? In the study the prisoners were shown different people, then asked to pick out the ones they would rob and the ones they would not rob. The prisoners were then asked what determined who they would rob and who they would not rob. The overwhelming answer was, they had all chose the ones they thought would not defend themselves. You see, there is something about us that attracts certain situations and people into our lives, without us even knowing it consciously.

I am not saying you celebrate after a rape or a theft, I am saying accept that there is something about you that attracted the rapist or the thief to choose you as their victim. Recognize it is those programs that keep playing and when we stop the programs we start attracting different things. It is important that we don’t blame ourselves, but take 100% responsibility. So we can then stop those programs that attracted that person or situation into our lives. And, please always remember, responsibility and guilt are not synonymous.

Please know this, there is nothing wrong with you. Take good care of yourself and love yourself. And most important, forgive yourself for being the victim and forgive the person that victimized you, so the pain can go away. When you don’t forgive, you are only hurting yourself and  not the other person.

Now you can let go of guilt, shame and resentment and use the experience to make a difference in another victim’s life.



13 Responses to “Ho'oponopono and abuse”
  1. Yanina says:

    Thank you very much for this information I love ho'oponopono.
    Let it go! set you free.


  2. Jonathan says:

    Thank you Mabel, this is beautiful. I just was allowed to attend a Self I-dentity Through Ho'oponopono class in Portland Oregon and it was life changing. I also Love Ho'oponopono.

    Jonathan Buford

  3. Katesa Wesche says:

    Thank you for the story. Enjoyed it

  4. RAKESH GOEL says:

    Very interesting and beautiful story. I was present in that training in Romania. It was life changing and wonderful.

  5. Antonietta says:

    grazie grazie grazie lo sto inparando e piccoli passi gia o fatto e favoloso un abbraccio di luce al mondo vi amo tutti

  6. Anna says:

    Dear Mabel, Thank you for your wonderful and priceless contribution to our lives... I cannot afford the sessions at the moment, but your blog helps me through the confirmation what I already know - in a very powerful way... I do clearings through the day regarding the particular problem I attracted in my life, and your teaching plant more wisdom in my mind confirming the value what I am doing, despite the fact that I don't always see immediate positive results. I do cherish the fact that my self-healing helps my ancestors, and my ancestors are the ancestors of others too, since we are all One. Blessings to you and thank you : )

  7. Kelly Martin says:

    More and more as I read your blog I understand, beyond the books your blog answers questions for me.

    Thank you!

  8. Nette says:

    Wow. Tears in my eyes. Beautiful how you expressed it all. Thank you.

  9. Chris says:

    Tell me please how a three year old draws a father to commit incest and she should take responsibility. I am not trying to be sarcastic. only trying to understand. Because I as well remember being shown a journey and being pulled through some sort of universe looking for the parents I would have or choose. I remember being told if I could learn to separate the action from the person I would know the true meaning of forgiveness and that would be my journey to teach others forgiveness and unconditional love. I do not understand this because it 50 I have suffered my six children have suffered and things are just starting to come together now ... How fair is that of me to have chosen this journey for six gifts I brought into this world I am doing a 35 year abusive marriage trying to teach forgiveness and unconditional love I do not see myself as a victim I see myself as a light of strength and love But I don't know my purpose I feel like whoever said they would be with me let go of my hand. I have found it through Christ and I realize he is never left my side but there's something more and I just can't find it

    • Mabel Katz says:

      Please read Dr. Michael Newton's book "The journey of the Souls". That might help you to understand how you planned everything before you incarnated and that everything was perfect even if it does't look like it now.
      Hard for the intellect to understand. There are no victims, plus always these things make you better and stronger and you can help and make a difference on other people's lives that go through different challenges.
      Thank you for the opportunity to clean with this.

  10. Amanda says:

    Dearest Mabel, you words were the most perfect words I could of read this morning. I was directed to read this, another reason to forgive and let go xx Thankyou so very much xx

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